I’ve been stunned lately with the power of telling the truth – the raw, uncensored truth.
It’s such a release, relief, and a joy to let the truth rip, rather than wasting so much psychic energy “spinning” the truth so that you project an image of doing better than you feel you are. (Those of you who’ve seen My 52 Mistakes know I’m committed to telling the truth about my mistakes, as hard as that is.)
I once knew a guy in my corporate life who, when asked, “How you doing, Fred? would answer, “Fantastic!” Every single day, Fred responded that he was “Fantastic.” God, I hated that. How can you be fantastic every single day?
I tried to figure out what was up with this man. I asked my mom what she thought about it, and she said, “Anyone who’s happy every day is an idiot!” Ha!
In trying to understand Fred, here’s what I came up with all those years ago:
Fred was perhaps:
1) a terrible liar, or
2) so distrustful of others and insecure he had to project a fake “fantastic” image, or
3) living life so superficially that every day was, in fact, fantastic or
4) living life so deeply that every day was, in fact, fantastic
Whatever the case, I didn’t resonate with this man at all, or with his same fantastic daily response.
Yesterday, I was talking to my awesome marketing advisor Krista Carnes of Booking Authors about my website, and I shared that over the past few months, I’ve heard people say this of my website:
1) It’s too professional – it intimidates me
2) You’ve accomplished so much, I don’t think I’m right for you (as a client)
3) How I experience you as a person (warm, compassion, approachable, caring, etc.) isn’t what comes across on your site
I’ve always been confused about those impressions because clearly I’m sending out a vibe that isn’t me.
I finally listened! Krista helped me see what I needed was to tell a bit more of the truth – about who I am, what I care about, what I’ve been through. And in that telling of truth, those who are meant to connect with me as clients, friends and colleagues, will resonate with my words and find me.
So I revised the site again with more of my personal voice – which is an interesting mix of the highly professional but also the very human, flawed and honest. I also shared my personal story of breakdown and breakthrough – which I realize many folks don’t know. (And wouldn’t you know I heard from three awesome women this very morning hoping to connect!). And please let me know your thoughts about the homepage copy – how’s it ring for you?
I work with women every day in all stages of their careers and businesses who want to tell the truth but struggle with how to do it, for fear of being rejected or judged negatively. From corporate execs needing a powerful resume, to entrepreneurial women crafting marketing copy for their new programs, to creative folks deciding if they want to embrace Twitter and get their messages out there – we all want to tell the truth about who we are and what we love. We’re just afraid.
So let’s start communicating more of the real truth, but do it from a lens of positivity. Tell the truth in a way that fits that facts well but allows room for as much hope, energy, and compassion as possible.
Make sure you tell the truth of who you really are – inside and out — whether you’re networking, speaking, writing, interviewing, or building clients and businesses. And make sure that your lens focus isn’t set to “negative” to the exclusion of all of the amazing positivity your truth can reveal.
When you do, your words and stories will attract what you long for most: the heart-aligned jobs, opportunities, clients, business, friends, colleagues who you really want – not a circle of people and experiences that leave you feeling alone and cold.
I’d LOVE to hear from you. PLEASE SHARE your comments below — where are you not telling the full truth, and can you access the courage today to tell more of your truth, share more of the real story?
Indeed, my friends, the truth will set you free! Love ya…