Posts Tagged ‘change’

5 Top Mistakes to Avoid in Your Career Reinvention

Friday, October 22nd, 2010

After spending nine years reinventing myself from a miserable and chronically ill corporate VP to women’s career and executive coach, marketing consultant, author, speaker and women’s work-life expert, I’ve made a good number of huge mistakes and missteps that have tripped me up, and at times, caused me to hang my head in my hands in despair.  I consciously avoid spending time in regret, but these mistakes were gruelling.  Yet I do believe that each and every one of these lessons has made me stronger, more expansive, more connected to who I really am, and ultimately more confident in my abilities to direct my life with satisfaction and joy. 

To help others learn from my mistakes, I’ve launched a new social media series called My 52 Mistakes, to share my top mistakes in life and work, and help others bypass the major pitfalls I encountered.  Here’s my list of my top 52.  Check it out and share your lessons!!

Here are the top five mistakes to avoid when in career transition and embarking on professional reinvention.  I’ve lived through these mistakes myself, and am stronger for it…but you don’t have to!

Mistake #1:

Don’t have a “build it and they will come” mentality without utilizing powerful financial, professional, and business-building tactics and strategies

Don’t make the mistake of confusing wishful thinking with powerful strategies for moving forward.  Certainly, faith and optimism are essential, but so are sound business and professional goals, plans and tactics, developed with deep know-how and expertise (your own or a great consulting partner), fueled by conscious intention and fierce commitment.  There are 5 “M’s” required for entrepreneurial success – ignore these at your peril.

 Mistake #2:

Don’t underestimate how long it will take you to build a successful new career

Leave your ego at the door when you’re evaluating how long reinvention will take.  Get advice from true experts in the field on the amount of time it will take to launch your new career, and make it successful and earn you a good living (that’s what you want, after all, isn’t it?).  It’s been said that becoming an expert in a field takes 10 years (I believe that’s true), and creating a self-sustaining small business or consulting practice often takes at least five years.

Mistake #3:

Don’t neglect having a Plan B, and moving to it when it’s time

In my book Breakdown, Breakthrough, I talk about what it takes to reinvent yourself.  Often it requires that you simply refuse to let in (mentally, emotionally, or spiritually) the possibility that you will fail (see Chapter 11 about the amazing comedian Monique Marvez’s journey to hell and back).  If you want something badly enough, most likely you’ll find a way to get it.  However, if you have a family to support, and other critical financial and other obligations that you feel you must fulfill in life, then you need a Plan B that will get you through the tough financial times.  Use Plan B to help you stay afloat while all along moving forward to your career dreams.

Mistake #4

Don’t wait too long to correct your course when you misstep or discover steps on your new path that are wrong for you

Set milestones (“I will achieve this by this date,” etc.), and review your progess frequently – quarterly at the least.   If you’re way off course, you need to course-correct.  Also, if where you’re going ends up feeling wrong, don’t keep going in the same direction.  Don’t make yourself “wrong” for how you feel.   Realize a change is necessary, and power up to make that change, and don’t wait until disaster strikes to make the correction.

Mistake #5

Don’t forget: A fantastic life takes fantastic risks

There’s an enormous difference between a “job” and a “calling.”  Neither is better or worse – it simply depends on what you want for your life, based on your values and priorities.  If it’s a calling you’ve be given to follow (a calling is not a voluntary pursuit, I’ve found), know now that it will require everything you’ve got to give, and then some.  Please don’t expect a fantastic life without understanding that you must risk a great deal to live your life on the cutting edge of experience.

 Other lessons I’ve learned through my nine-year reinvention:

1.There will be times (many, in fact) that you have no idea what to do, and despite all your efforts, you fail at the task at hand
2. If you don’t remain “teachable” at all times, you’ll suffer
3. If you think you’re immune (to anything – the economy, challenges in the workplace, problems in building your business to a satisfactory level), you’re wrong
4. When you lose your compassion for others who are challenged in their reinvention or in their efforts to launch themselves successfully, you’ll suddenly experience something that brings you back to humility
5. You’ll need faith, patience, and perseverance in greater supply than you ever thought possible
6. It’s not all up to you – things happen outside your sphere of influence that can shift your course
7. Reaching out for help is essential when you’re not where you want to be
8. Being part of a like-minded community that offers support, guidance, and encouragement is a blessing and a good business strategy
9. Career reinventing is a life-long process (not a one-time deal), and once you embark on it, it changes you forever.  It’s a process that leads you to feel so appreciative of all that you are – flaws, gifts, strengths, blindspots and all – and so excited for each new day that brings you closer to yourself.
10. Reinvention is not for the faint of heart, but oh my…if you’re up for it, what gifts it brings.

What are the biggest mistakes you’ve made in reinventing your career?  I’d love to hear.  Share your insights with us! We all learn from each other.

Wishing you a joyful career reinvention!  And let me know if you’d like some help – I’ve been there.

“We’d Rather Die Than Be Divided”

Friday, November 13th, 2009

This past Wednesday, I attended a very powerful and moving event in Greenwich, CT, hosted by 85 broads.  It was an inspiring forum and gathering of trailblazing women, all of whom want to make a difference – no matter how small or large — in the world around them. 

 

Whether they’re impacting law, finance, politics, technology, corporate policy, fashion, or non-profit, each attendee has a dream to not only succeed abundantly, but also help other women and impact the world in the process. 

 

Marie Wilson – President and Founder of The White House Project was the featured speaker, and my God, what a powerful individual, women’s advocate , and speaker she is.  She shared many riveting stories and vital information about the state of women in political leadership today, and how sorely lacking the U.S. is in representation of women in leadership. 

 

The story that touched me most deeply, however, was about a group of young girls, 12 years of age or so, in Rwanda.  Marie tells of these girls who were gathered together in their classroom in school, when suddenly insurgents crashed into their classroom with guns flying, and demanded that the girls divide themselves (ostensibly for the purpose of selecting who would be killed and who spared). 

 

The girls sat completely motionless, saying nothing.  The gunman screamed again, “DIVIDE YOURSELVES!”  Again the girls did not move or speak.  After a few long moments, one lone little girl replied, “We would rather die than divide ourselves.”

 

The moment I heard this story, I realized something that shook me.  We in this country divide ourselves constantly – we make others wrong, we judge and criticize, and put ourselves above others (or beneath them), we distance ourselves and create walls around us – as a constant practice.

 

What is needed most today — among women and among all human beings — is connection, community and commitment.  Connection – so that we can feel more for each other’s experiences, and can demonstrate compassion, empathy and validation.  Community -  because we can do so much more together than we can do alone, and being together uplifts us.  And finally – commitment.  It doesn’t matter what you “want” in life – what matters is what you’re truly committed to creating.

 

“We would rather die than be divided.”  That’s a principle that I am now committed to living by.

 

Thank you, Marie Wilson, and Janet Hanson of 85 Broads for reminding us that community, connection, and commitment changes the world.

 

What are you committed to creating in your life, and where can you find connection and community to support you?

"We'd Rather Die Than Be Divided"

Friday, November 13th, 2009

This past Wednesday, I attended a very powerful and moving event in Greenwich, CT, hosted by 85 broads.  It was an inspiring forum and gathering of trailblazing women, all of whom want to make a difference – no matter how small or large — in the world around them. 

 

Whether they’re impacting law, finance, politics, technology, corporate policy, fashion, or non-profit, each attendee has a dream to not only succeed abundantly, but also help other women and impact the world in the process. 

 

Marie Wilson – President and Founder of The White House Project was the featured speaker, and my God, what a powerful individual, women’s advocate , and speaker she is.  She shared many riveting stories and vital information about the state of women in political leadership today, and how sorely lacking the U.S. is in representation of women in leadership. 

 

The story that touched me most deeply, however, was about a group of young girls, 12 years of age or so, in Rwanda.  Marie tells of these girls who were gathered together in their classroom in school, when suddenly insurgents crashed into their classroom with guns flying, and demanded that the girls divide themselves (ostensibly for the purpose of selecting who would be killed and who spared). 

 

The girls sat completely motionless, saying nothing.  The gunman screamed again, “DIVIDE YOURSELVES!”  Again the girls did not move or speak.  After a few long moments, one lone little girl replied, “We would rather die than divide ourselves.”

 

The moment I heard this story, I realized something that shook me.  We in this country divide ourselves constantly – we make others wrong, we judge and criticize, and put ourselves above others (or beneath them), we distance ourselves and create walls around us – as a constant practice.

 

What is needed most today — among women and among all human beings — is connection, community and commitment.  Connection – so that we can feel more for each other’s experiences, and can demonstrate compassion, empathy and validation.  Community -  because we can do so much more together than we can do alone, and being together uplifts us.  And finally – commitment.  It doesn’t matter what you “want” in life – what matters is what you’re truly committed to creating.

 

“We would rather die than be divided.”  That’s a principle that I am now committed to living by.

 

Thank you, Marie Wilson, and Janet Hanson of 85 Broads for reminding us that community, connection, and commitment changes the world.

 

What are you committed to creating in your life, and where can you find connection and community to support you?

The Power of Community for Women

Thursday, April 30th, 2009

This past Monday, I co-facilitated a stimulating seminar in Greenwich, CT with a colleague of mine and a great financial advisor, on Keys to Successful Career Transition: Personal and Financial Steps to Take in Times of Change, and something very powerful occurred. 

 

The group of women who attended – 8 in total – not only found a unique forum in which to openly share and explore their situations, but several of them were moved immediately afterwards to make dramatic changes in their lives, to take steps they’d dream of for months (even years), and also offer help to the other women who had attended.

 

I see this phenomenon frequently – women may feel completely stuck and alone (“broken down” as I call it) in their problems, but when they make the commitment to take a small step to help themselves – for instance, to attend a seminar or become “teachable” about what they could do to create movement in their lives – everything shifts.

 

Further, many women who choose to embark on the work necessary to create breakthrough in their own lives find themselves compelled to help others do the same.  Coming together in groups – whether it’s for support, networking, or learning – unleashes beautiful longings, dreams, and visions in women.  Community, authentic sharing and being open to learning are the keys to growth.

 

If you’re longing for breakthrough in your life, take a step today.  Find a group to participate in – a networking group, a class, a seminar, whatever appeals — and bring your open heart and your beginner’s mind to the experience.  A positive and powerful shift for you will occur there, if you embrace the possibility.

 

If you’ve dabbled with the idea of creating your own community group, I hope you’ll consider it seriously then take action.  If you long to do it, you’re meant to do it.  Please feel free to download my free Breakthrough Group Study Guide (based on my book Breakdown, Breakthrough), which will get you on your way to forming and facilitating a powerful community of like-minded women whom you can learn from, and support, to make the career and life changes you dream of.  And feel free to write me at Kathy@elliacommunications.com if the inner coach in you dreams of moving forward, and you need a bit of help to start.

 

Please take the step now – find or build your own community of women who are ready to create breakthrough today.

 

 

A New Day

Wednesday, January 21st, 2009

From my view, yesterday was a miraculous day, making possible a great shifting on many levels.  In full and intensive view was not only President Obama and what he stands for personally and politically, but also a living manifestation –  a visual role model — of the power of undying hope, determination, faith, dedication and self-actualization powered by generations.   We’ve seen before our eyes what self-determination can bring forth, and it’s an awesome thing to behold.

 

To witness (and participate in) a hero’s journey in our lifetime changes us.  In my 48 years, I personally have never been so moved and inspired as I was yesterday.  Today I feel renewed and exhilarated, and am reminded again that this is a life of possibility – not an “either-or” life but an “everything” life, where what you dream of can indeed be created, not overnight, and not the moment we wish it, but in time.

 

What possibilities are newly born in you today, and how can you begin to make them a reality in your life?