Newsletter Signup




Tag Archives: coaching

What Do I Do When My Boss Is Threatened By Me?

Kathy's Video Blog "Work You Love"

Welcome to Episode #6 of my weekly video blog Work You Love!

Today, I’m addressing a powerful question I received from Tina about a challenging relationship with her boss:

“My boss is out to get me. I have more experience than she does. She’s threatened by my work, and my solid community of friends and supporters. She undermines me, and keeps me from gaining exposure to senior leadership. I’m considering going to HR to talk about this situation, but I’m reluctant to take that step. What do you think?”

Here are my thoughts on that:



Don’t despair – you CAN deal with these challenges, and find a way to take control. Get some outside support in the form of a sponsor, mentor, or coaching buddy to help you brainstorm and pursue new, effective ways to address this problem.  There are other alternatives besides fight or flight.

Today’s top message (and tweetable):

CLICK TO TWEET: If your boss undermines you, take control of the situation – you don’t have to remain a victim.

Thank you for watching Work You Love, and many happy breakthroughs. See you next week!

(If you have a burning career question you’d like me to answer, SUBMIT IT HERE! I’ll do my best to address it in some form in the weeks to come.)

Also, join me on November 19th from Noon to 1:00 pm for my FREE teleclass Breakthrough To Your BOLD Plan for More Happiness, Success and Reward.   Find out how to take your career to the next level of success and happiness!



Should I Risk Pursuing a Career I Love, Or Stay Put?

Kathy's Video Blog "Work You Love"

Welcome to Episode #5 of my weekly video blog Work You Love!

Today, I’m addressing a critical career change question that I received from Marie this week on the LinkedIn group Connect: Professional Women’s Network, Powered by Citi:

“I love working with animals but I have a hard time pinning down what I want to do with that.  I’ve tried grooming, vet’s office, animal care, caged animal research …but now I’m thinking of changing again to ecology or animal conservation.  I tend to get bored if I’m in the same position for too long but then I don’t move up in whichever company I’m working for.  What do you think is more valuable …searching for the right career (what if I don’t find it?) or gaining experience in one field?”

Great question.  Here are my thoughts on that:



I hope you’ll take these messages to heart and strive to find the right career that aligns with your values, passions, talents and skills. I did, and it changed my life.

Today’s top message (and tweetable):
Don’t take no for an answer. FIND the right career – you deserve it, you need it, and the world needs you.

Thank you for watching Work You Love, and many happy breakthroughs!

(If you have a burning career question you’d like me to answer, SUBMIT IT HERE! I’ll do my best to address it in some form in the weeks to come.)

Also, I’ll be serving as a career adviser/expert all day October 30th on the LinkedIn’s group Connect: Professional Women’s Network.  Join me there!

5 Key Steps to Your New Career in 2012

As a career coach, I spend a great deal of time reviewing the details of people’s lives and careers and making sense of the seeming randomness.  With clients who want a new career, I always begin by having them complete my Career Path Self-Assessment, an in-depth survey which leads them to deeply examine their early selves, their previous jobs, and a variety of other important information.  From this array of data, I uncover core life themes, roadblocks, unique skills and talents, and lost passions.  I put this all together to identify more fulfilling and exciting professional directions.

While it’s very helpful to have a great career coach, the reality is that you can do this on your own.  I’ve found after years of coaching that there are five core steps everyone can take to identify new career paths that will align more closely with who you are, and bring you more success and reward. 

Why should you take these steps? 
Because you have the right to love what you do and do what you love.  People like to claim that loving your work is a pipedream – but those who defend that view are wrong.  Enjoying your career and feeling there’s deep meaning and purpose in it is not just for a select, fortunate few.   It’s for anyone who believes in him/herself and takes the right kind of action.

CLICK HERE here to read my full article on Forbes about the top five most effective steps to take to figure yourself out and get on track to a more fulfilling career.

What did you love to do in your early years, and are you drawing on those skills, gifts and talents today?

Enhanced by Zemanta

Before You Ask Someone for Free Help, Reconsider

HELPI’ve been utterly floored this past month by the volume of requests I’ve received for FREE help from complete strangers, and by the nature and content of these requests. 

The bulk of these requests have come in from readers of my article LinkedIn: Busting 8 Damaging Myths About What It Can Do For Your Career, that ran on on September 13th.  It surprised all of us (the Forbes editors and me) as it blew up on the front page and was viewed by over 60,000 people.  

That week, I literally heard from over 150 folks asking for all sorts of free help and I continue to get requests, including my review and recommendations on: their LinkedIn profiles, resumes, job or career options, potential career changes, interview approaches, how to get testimonials, and on and on.

What I’m stunned about is that in all of these requests for free help, not ONE person offered to pay for my time, or suggested bartering with something of value.  They simply wanted help without offering anything in return.   Perhaps I’m crazy, but I would never ask a stranger for help in this way.

Further, a good number of these requests for free help were:

1)      Urgent – “I have an urgent career decision to make. Can you respond asap?”


 2)      Disrespectful – These folks didn’t care or consider for a second that I make my living offering career counsel.  I’m not a non-profit or a charity; I’m a business owner.  And I’m really good at what I do, after years of training and experience.  It takes a significant amount of time and energy to review someone’s information/situation and offer tailored recommendations.  I deserve to be paid for my time and effort. 

(For the record, I do offer my time for free, but on a very selective basis to organizations and non-profits that have a broad reach and help hundreds of people through their services.)

 3)      Narcissistic – It’s all about them, and what they need and how soon.  Never a second thought about what I might need in order to be of service to them.

4)      Clueless – It’s clear that these folks hadn’t a clue that theirs was one of hundreds of similar requests, and as such, impossible to accommodate without their becoming a client of mine, and having time scheduled in my calendar.

Please don’t get me wrong.  I’m truly honored and excited that my writing touched a chord and resonated with so many people, and I certainly hope that trend continues.  And I do LOVE to be of service to people, helping them make positive change.  And I love hearing from folks about how my writing impacted them.

That being said, I’m tired and fed up with free help requests.  It remains shocking to me that so many people all across the globe who want help forget to be considerate and respectful of those they’re asking support from.  Come on people!  Let’s reverse that trend.

My hope is that going forward, anyone who asks another individual for free help will be more considerate and thoughtful prior to making the request.  Think about what the helping party deserves for his/her support, what it will take from them to give you the help you want, and what you can offer in return.  If you can’t offer money, think about what you can provide that would be meaningful.  NEVER ask without considering these issues beforehand.

One more thing – for every request you make for FREE help, offer someone else free help instead.

Are Your Values Keeping You From Earning More Money?

Last week, I had the immense pleasure of conducting a coaching training course for the CT Women’s Business Development Council.  I shared the day with an amazing, inspiring group of women who work throughout Connecticut and are heart-committed to helping others get on more solid ground with their finances.  (By the way, if you don’t know about the Women’s Business Development Council, do check them out!).

In the program, we conducted a number of role-play exercises illustrating the power of coaching, and one exercise truly took me by surprise.  In this exercise, each of us explored our intrinsic, heart-felt values – what we care about deeply and what we need in our lives to feel fulfilled and to craft a life worth living. 

After the exercise, we evaluated how these values are supporting us, and also how they may be clashing, in fact, with our desire and need to make more money, and to save and invest wisely. Fascinating discussion…

In doing the internal work of this exercise myself, I was reminded that I value the following traits very highly in my work:

1) Helping people make positive, lasting change (value: making a difference)
2) Authenticity and individuality (value: truth-telling)
3) Offering help and insights based on reality (value: realism)
4) Delivering programs informed by research (value: expertise/diligence)
4) Endeavoring to offer something of value that exceeds what my clients pay (value: service)

When I compare my values and behaviors to those of some other service providers, I see key differences.  A large number (not a majority perhaps, but many) consultants and providers these days seem to value making money over all else, by:

–  Using hard-hitting marketing promises to convince clients about what they can achieve (no matter how likely those outcomes are)
– Accepting clients who are desperate financially, but don’t have the ability to recoup the money they invest in the coach/consultant
– Encouraging clients to put out programs and materials that offer less than high value or strong content
– Making abundant success sound very easy and very accessible to all
– Talking about how they personally made their money, not what the client needs to do in these times to make their own money
– Using fear tactics to scare clients into thinking if they don’t hire the consultant/coach, they’ll fail

On the contrary, when I looked very closely at my own values as well as my outer behaviors, I realized that my intrinsic values have prompted actions that in some ways clashed with my desired outcome of inviting more money into my business. As an example, I tend to give far too much away for free and then feel resentful and angry, and I have a hard time honoring my own boundaries about the type of coaching projects I will and will not accept.

After a long, hard evaluation, I now understand that what I want to change is not my values, but the way in which I express them.  For instance, I’m focused more keenly on being of service to people who are in synch with me about what they value and the outcomes they wish to produce.  I’m also more committed to working with those who are happy and able to pay fairly for the time and support they receive. 

The ultimate goal, I think, is to honor your values fully, while engaging in conscious behaviors that are in alignment with who you really are and what you want in life.

It’s a very powerful exercise to understand exactly what you value, and explore how these values prompt unconscious behaviors that hold you back from achieving core goals such as greater financial success.  I’d recommend doing this exercise today!

Question for the day: What do you value deeply in your life and work?  And how might these values be (unconsciously) promoting behaviors that hold you back from creating a higher level of desired success. Please share what you discover!  

Career Path Self-Assessment

6 Days to a Happier Career!

Subscribe and get my:

6-Day Amazing Career Email Challenge
Career Path
Self-Assessment Survey